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No words

Soooooo every day I come in here and attempt to write on the situation regarding me and the married ex that has resurfaced… .But everyday the post is left undone. I really have no words to describe the situation. But yes he has popped upagain with the texting. It’s been since the last week of August. He’s even sent pictures of the big headed baby. When he had called me in December he mentioned that his wife was pregnant. And I had ran into a mutual friend of ours from my hometown back in July and he mentioned that the ex had just had his son. So I knew about the baby.

I’m hoping the reason he reached out was because he’s coming to Homecoming and was wondering how it was going to be between us..( I never asked why he bothered to text me) ..He’s confident that he’s going to be able to handle it. So I’m like if you’re confident then we shouldn’t even be having this conversation. I initially thought it was going to be just a catching up text conversation. But I swear you give somebody an inch and they take a mile. Needless to say I hear from a few times a week. And they’re not just a couple of text messages. We end up conversing for hours.

Don’t get me wrong I’ve enjoyed talking to him as long as the conversations are appropriate. But since he’s coming to Homecoming I’m just going to hold off on my kicks rocks message. Considering our school is small we’ll definitely run into each other. So for the most part I’mma just keep faking the funk and converse. And then after Homecoming I’mma go ahead and pull a disappearing act….

For the most part I’m happy to know that it wasn’t just me… I was being hard on myself whenever he crossed my mind. I couldn’t understand why I allowed myself to still think about him. During our first text message he stated that he missed talking to me. I was flattered but that’s definitely about it. Just happy to know that the thoughts weren’t one sided.

So yeah…. He just celebrated his first anniversary. Might I add he was texting me the day before and the day after. So blank stare to him about that………

I really just have no words about the situation. Not making excuses because I know there are none on my behalf. That is all.

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