Home > Uncategorized > It’s bittersweet, It’s bittersweet……..

It’s bittersweet, It’s bittersweet……..

Okay so there’s a couple of things that I would like to get off my chest as a result of listening to Fantasia’s new song “Bittersweet”

The lyrics:

Every now and then
I still get a flashback
Of the time I spent
Thinking you could be that one
Should I have just kept your love?

Yes I understand,
We did have some good times
On the other hand,
Got my crying all night
It was too much for my mind

So even though I left you
I can’t forget you
‘Cause when I think about you
It’s bittersweet, it’s bittersweet
Guess I’ll always love you
It’s bittersweet, it’s bittersweet

When we were together
You ain’t treat me right
Damn I really love you
I ain’t gonna lie

‘Cause when I think about you
It’s bittersweet…

I still have the box
Full of things you gave me
Start to throw it out
Something always stops me, yeah
I’m not as over you as I said

Deep inside my heart
I made the right decision
But it’s gonna hurt
When you might less think it
Did I make a big mistake?

Even though I left you
I can’t forget you
‘Cause when I think about you
It’s bittersweet, it’s bittersweet
Guess I’ll always love you
It’s bittersweet, it’s bittersweet

When we were together
You ain’t treat me right
Then I really love you
I ain’t gonna lie

‘Cause when I think about you
It’s bittersweet…

See I don’t understand
Like, somebody is gonna get hurt
Out of this situation
And you just hope it’s not you

At times…

Part of me wants you, part of me don’t
Part of me is missing you, part of me is gone
Part of me is saying that the love is still strong,
Part of me is letting go

So even though I left you
I can’t forget you
‘Cause when I think about you
It’s bittersweet, it’s bittersweet
Guess I’ll always love you
It’s bittersweet, it’s bittersweet

I’m really feeling this song right now. Because my past relationships are bittersweet. And unfortunately every time I hear this song two individuals pop into my brain.

1. I miss my ex… The one who is now married.  The last time we communicated was in December and this is the longest that we’ve went without some form of communication since 2002. The decision to stop communicating with him was for the best…. At the same time I was used to him being a part of my life for the last 8 years….So I miss him. Not even the relationship aspect but the friendship aspect. We talked about everything under the sun and I honestly miss that…. Oh well!!!!!!!

2. The ex from high school is also on the brain. I don’t know why though. Part of me wonders if something is there. Part of me don’t even want to know because our situation is WEIRD to say the least. We converse or text pretty much on a weekly basis. Right now I’m happy for him because he has a lot of things going for him. He just got a new job, new car, and new house…. So he’s on his way. But it’s one of those situations where I just don’t knowwhich route we should go……

 We ended up seeing each other over Memorial Day Weekend….. We had passed each other and I told him to bring his new truck by so I could see it. He ended up stopping by and we chatted for a bit outside. I really couldn’t look at the truck like I wanted to because I happened to peak in the back and seen his son back there chillen. It wasn’t a situation where he was like oh there’s my son or anything. To be honest I don’t even know if he know that I seen him. I kind of wanted to call him out about it but I didn’t because I didn’t know his reasoning behind so I just left it alone.

So yeah… Our situation is just so complex. I know when I had wrote about it previously it seemed messy as all get out….I really can’t describe it other than some of it’s bittersweet. Part of me loves the fact that we are still friends. Part of me probably never wants for us to go down that path again….

I don’t know what to say other than it’s BITTERSWEET… All of it…. Sighhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!

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Categories: Uncategorized
  1. L.P.
    June 24, 2010 at 4:09 pm

    Ms80’s , ms80’s, ms80’s…. how many times did I call your name? 🙂

    The situation with the High school ex is not complex. It’s actually pretty simple. The fact that he left his baby in the car by himself does not look good on him… He is doing all these things and achieving all these things because he has the support to do so… The girl he is with. Let it go, lady. Nothing good can come out of it.

    You give a hard time to a guy who actually wants to be with you because he supposedly can’t spell but yet pine away for a dude who is unavailable and leaves his son in a hot ass truck… Darling? You know that’s not right.

    And I won’t even comment on ex #1… He is married. Point blank. He made his choice. He had the luxury to pick you but he chose someone else, so that’s what it is Hon.

    Give your present life a chance. The past is good but we often romanticize it to make it look better than what it actually was. Live your life NOW! Not yesterday or tomorrow.

    • ms80sbaby
      June 24, 2010 at 4:56 pm

      I totally understand the points that you are making…

      Regarding the son in the car we both pulled up at my parents house at the same time and we both hopped out with our cars running. It was simply for me to see the car and keep it moving. He had already stopped at my house once when he seen my car but I wasn’t there…..But we were literally standing in the middle of our cars for a couple of minutes at the most and then we both went our seperate ways.

      I realize no good may come from it and that’s why its a situation where we are just friends. But is it that bad for me to wonder? I could see if our paths never crossed but whether we intentionally want them too or not they are always going to. We have cousins who are married so when we have a family function his cousin is there and a conversation usually occurrs where he is brought up. Just like this past Friday. His cousin comes up to me oh yea you know cuz’s bday is today and he goes on to talk about him planning a trip to where he’s at.

      And with the married ex. I am making no excuses. I know his choice was not me…. In regards to me missing him it was moreso the conversations….. Am I wrong for missing that aspect??? Considering the fact that he’s no longer a part of my life there is no one that I can tell everything to. Am I wrong for thinking its bittersweet that I had that at a point and I don’t have that now. It’s plenty of family situations that I only confided with him about. The situations are still ocurring and I’m just holding all of it in because my outlet is gone. So I can’t miss the fact that I had an outlet at a point?

      I hope that I am not giving off the impression that my previous relationships were ideal. Because that is definitely not my intent. I feel like I am living my life now. However a lot of things trigger my memory… Unfortunately whether I want it to or not.

      Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry®

    • ms80sbaby
      June 24, 2010 at 10:16 pm

      I was just playing about the spelling….. But seriously if it’s a word I’m not for sure about I just don’t use it…. I have never called him out about his spelling. If you are messing up the word soggy horribly then Houston we may have a problem. #imjussayin But this is coming from the person who told my momma that she can be my friend on fb but she getting deleted the moment she start spelling stuff wrong.

      But how am I giving him a hard time…Because I give him church hugs? I can’t tell that he wants to be with me. Initially yeah. But for a while now. Ummm no.

      Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry®

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