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So I’ve always had body issues. I think it could have came from developing boobies in the third grade. And then it seemed like they just kept growing and growing and growing and I was never comfortable with them.  I would try to hide them more than anything. Then my stomach. My good ol’ stomach was never the flattest thing either. I never really loved or accepted my body.

It was very rare for me to look in the mirror and like my reflection. It was more so I just ignored it. Or when I did look I didn’t necessarily like what I was seeing. It was more like an ugh and I noticed all of my flaws. So me and my body never really had a good relationship. I was never one to say my body is beautiful and yadda, yadda, yadda. You know how some people can stand in the mirror and look at themselves naked. That is definitely not me. I was never comfortable in the skin I was in.

Thinking back the flaws with my body did roll over into my sex life. If I wasn’t even comfortable lookin’ at my body then just imagine how I was w/ the ex. AWKWARD and uncomfortable to say the least. I never gave off that confident sexy vibe in the bedroom. That’s another reason why the sex was blah and I still have no clue what I’m missing out on.  But I can also see how the body image also transferred into how I carried my self. Not saying that I needed to walk around as if I was a sex kitten but I never considered myself  SEXY. If you looked up sexy in the dictionary then my picture would definitely not be there. My picture would have probably been under awkward.

Anywho, I took a belly dancing class with my coworkers back in 2006 and surprisingly that helped bring out some sexiness in me. I don’t know if it was because some of the moves are kind of intimate and you really have to be in tune with your body. Or what? But ever since then I have viewed myself in a more sexy manner. So I was making progress in at least one area.

So now I’ve been going to gym. And I’ve been noticing changes.  Man, I feel like the boobies are small now. Even though they’re really not. And I’ve also noticed a change in the way my pants are fitting. I have all kind of room in the waist. A lot of my pants are bordlerline too big now.

However, I’m noticing the results in a subtle manner. Not necessarily by  examining myself in the mirror. Last night for some reason still not for sure why but I was walking around in my sports bra and  yoga pants. I happened to look in the mirror in my dining room and was caught off guard. Now mind you my back wall in the dining room is pretty much a huge mirror. But for some reason when I looked I actually paid attention to my reflection. And…Guess what???? I actually liked it. Usually if I see my stomach I’m more so SMH or something along those lines. But this time I actually was pleased with my body. Like I literally stared at myself like wow my body looks great!!!! The results from me going to the gym are impressive. It was to the point I pulled out my camera and set the automatic timer so I could show this off. I sent the pic to my sis and my bestie like check me out. So right now I’m on cloud nine. Maybe because I’ve never felt like this before. I kno nothing about being happy about the skin I’m in. Until now. And it feels wonderful.

2010 just might be my year. I am learning so much about myself and it feels great. And it’s just bubbling out of me. Someone just called my office phone and they were like you’re too bubbly for me. My response was simply I’m happy. I truly am. Happy w/ myself and happy w/ my results.

Categories: Uncategorized
  1. V Renee
    April 15, 2010 at 4:34 pm

    I loved this post!! Accepting your body, flaws and all is an amazing feeling. It’s liberating. And being comfortable/confident in your skin is sexy and noticeable to others. Kudos to you!! Besides you only have one body, with no option to trade it in. Might as well be comfortable in it. 🙂

  2. L.P.
    April 15, 2010 at 6:03 pm

    Like V, I absolutely loved this post!! The confidence and sexyness oozed out of every line. I like it.

    You know, it’s been shown that without even noticeable results being engaged in physical activities make us appreciate and accept our bodies a lot more… because we are reminded of what great tools they are. That’s why they encourage young girls in sports and other activities.

    I still have no clue what I’m missing out on.

    You know what? That could also be a blessing… but I’m going to need you to do some exploring on yourself and get comfortable with chex right now!! We don’t want to wait for an SO to get knowledgeable in that area. Lol!

    I really, really like this post. And boobage is ALWAYS a plus.

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