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I am changing…….

I am definitely not perfect. I have flaws just like everybody else. One of my biggest flaws is that I can pop off at the mouth. Quickly. Nobody is going to blatantly disrespect me and I’m just supposed to take it. Especially people who tend to talk to me any kind of way because of the “alleged” authority that comes with their job. Nope, I can’t see that happening.

For example, one late summer night I was sitting on my porch and seen a bunch of young kids in a parking lot. I noticed the police pull up and started arresting some of them. So I’m looking and I notice that one is a younger cousin. So I march right on up there to investigate. I talk to the officers regarding my cousin’s arrest. I was told that he was going to be charged with failure to disperse because they told them to go home. So I go get my daddy and go get some money because I was going to get my cousin out.  While waiting for him to be booked, so many people started coming up there. It was as if they were just driving out arresting folks that night. My cousin still wasn’t ready. So I ask one of dispatchers what’s taking so long with my cousin. She proceeds to tell me all of his alleged charges. I tried to explain that there had to be a mistake because thats not what the arresting officer just told me. She got real rude and nasty with me. I popped off. She threatened to throw me in jail with him. I didn’t care. I still went off and let her know that the blue uniform didn’t scare me nor did it allow her to talk to me any kind of way. My daddy ended up literally pushing me out of there and taking me to the car because I was not backing down.

Fast forward to this past weekend. My high school was playing in a playoff game. (we lost by the way) So during halftime I’m standing by the concession stand talking to a classmate who was recently married. My cousin walks by. He’s looking for his mom so I let him use my phone. Out of nowhere some old man with a blue vest come screaming, “What’s going on, can you not read? It says no standing”.  I breathed deeply and explained that my cousin who is in the band is trying to find his mom. Before he could walk away another one came up talking nasty and being rude. I just had to breathe again. My cousin seen my face and just gave me my phone because he already knew I was about to have a moment. By this time I’m flustered and I couldn’t figure out where I was sitting. All the sections were looking alike and I could not find my mom for nothing. I kept walking back and forth from section to section trying to find my seat. Again, these fake  security people started harrassing me once again threatening to get the police to have me ejected. At one point they even brought the police over to me and I didn’t say a word. I looked and actually held my hands up to let them know that I was holding it in. It took EVERYTHING in me to not say anything. For one, I DID NOT appreciate them old men talking to me crazy. I wanted to go clean off and tell them they needed to be at Wal-mart being somebody’s greeter instead of harrassing folks since they thought they had some power.

The only thing that stopped me from popping off was the fact that I had to remember the occasion. I was not trying to be the one giving my town bad representation. It was not the place for that. I also had to think about if I was ejected then I was going to be seperated from my party and it was going to be a mess with them trying to find me. It was very frustrating to just stand there and take it. But I did it. Unfortunately, that experience messed up the rest of the game for me. Once I finally made it back to my seat I couldn’t calm down because I was so worked up. I was literally sitting there shaking because I was so angry.

 I will admit that this was one of the hardest things that I’ve had to do. In the end, I’m glad I did it because everybody at the game didn’t  need to see that side of me. I hate that I have that side and I’m working on it. I try not to let a lot of things get to me but I absolutely hate for people to talk to me crazy. It bothers me with a passion and I lose it ASAP. I’m acknowledging this as one of my flaws and I’m working on it. Hopefully, I am changing………

What about you? What makes you pop off instantly? Do you have any flaws? Talk to me……

Categories: Uncategorized
  1. V Renee
    November 18, 2009 at 11:31 am

    I’ve always been rather calm. Even when others around me get riled up, I usually am cool as a cucumber. But there have been certain situations that TOOK ME THERE! I don’t think that will ever change. 

    I’ma tell a story I don’t think I’ve ever told yall. Back in college, I was the queen of getting my car towed. And 90% of the time, it was my fault. I knew that it was a college town and therefore they towed over ANY and EVERY thing. But I’m hard headed and like to do a little something called whatever the phuck I want. Well this one time, my senior year, I was between classes. I ran home to get a book for my next class. I parked in the parking lot of the two family I lived in at the time. BUT I did not have a parking pass because I thought it was ridiculous to have to buy one to park in a freaking alley. Well I literally was in the house less than 5 minutes. I come out to leave and the tow truck people were out there TOWING MY CAR. I tried to explain that I lived there and just ran inside to grab a book. They told me for $80, they would unhook my car. I flipped the phuck out! I ran back inside the house, grabbed a hammer, ran back outside and started beating whatever the thing was they had on my tire. To say they did not know what to do was an understatement. I know in their mind they wanted to beat the sh*t out of me but couldn’t. 

    So they called the police. Meanwhile I’m still hammering away. The thing would NOT come off. So I hopped in the car, turned it on and hit the gas. The car came down. By this time, another one of their tow buddies had pulled up and blocked me in. I was IRATE. I cussed every one of them out like I’ve never cussed anyone out before. 

    About 5 police cars ended up coming. One of the officers took my hammer and put it on top of the car. I tried telling them the situation. They were slightly amused by it all, and reminded me that even though I liked there, I needed a pass. So they still ended up towing the car but didn’t press charges against me. The even funnier part is, that once I realized the car was getting towed but they weren’t pressing charges, I went inside. When I got inside, I realized my hammer was still outside.  So I politely walked through the crowd of officers and tow truck guys, grabbed my hammer off the top of the police car and went back inside. 

    When I later called to see how much I had to pay to get the car back, they told me $500. For the car and damaging their equipment. I got my daddy on the phone, he ended up driving the hour and half up there. We went to the place together. He stood outside and politicked with the guy. At one point he called me out of the car and was like “this guy said you called him an azzhole. I think you owe him an apology.” Me being stubborn said “He is an azzhole”. My daddy cut me off and told me to get my azz back in the car. I don’t know what else was said, but I know my daddy didn’t pay anything and drove the car off the lot. He too cussed me out and then made the drive back to Cincinnati. LMAO. That’s why I love my daddy. Even though I was in the wrong for the entire situation, he still came through for me. 

    Moral of the story. Wait there is none. LMAO. Naw I was dead wrong. I took my frustration with continuously getting towed (my fault) out on them. 

    And yup I blogged in your comments. ☺ Oh and I still will pop off if I deem it necessary. But that’s after quickly assessing the situation and taking a gander at potential consequences.

  2. November 18, 2009 at 4:18 pm

    And yup I blogged in your comments. ☺ Oh and I still will pop off if I deem it necessary. But that’s after quickly assessing the situation and taking a gander at potential consequences.”

    THIS STORY …wow..LOL***thinking*** about mine.

    I got pulled over by a nosey a!ss cop right in front of my house last christmas. He said i doubled parked at this grocery store too close to the stop sign.

    Mind you this cop was cute too.. LOL..and he asked for my drivers license and registration. And I gave it to him. And I was like..that is really stupid..all those people that were double parking..and you wait and follow me home.

    and he was like..ma’am have a good nite and gave me back my stuff..what a nosey jack!ass.

  3. LP
    November 18, 2009 at 5:02 pm

    V has me DYING!!! I am trying to picture you hammering away at stuff, lol!

    I used to be very hot tempered and I often say that if I lived in the US prior to my calming down, I would have had several jail records.

    There are so many stories. I lived in Morocco for 3 years. And one thing about Morocco besides it being beautiful and a tourist trap is the blatant racism of Arabs towards black folks or “Africans” like they call (like they live in Europe.. *smh*)…. I mean take a girl who has never encountered any type of racism in her life for 18 years… who feels pretty great in her skin (too great at times) and move her to this fucked up environment where ARABS, damn ARABS think they are better than you… and SAY it loud calling you the Moroccan equivalent of the N word everywhere you go and not having anybody or any way to complain. I mean at times the kids will follow from your apartment to the bus stop chanting things like “N word, go back to where you come from, you stink and all other ignorant type of sh!t”…. and they found it funny… and adults laughed. Basically, it was A MESS! And I think I had never been more angry in my life than my first year in Morocco!! (after a while you stop noticing).

    So this one day, we got on the bus… my homegirl and I (the one who later met the rich politician). Automatically, we started hearing the stupid jokes and name calling… but we didn’t say anything and just kept chitchatting. They keep at it, trying to engage us and provoke us, and we change seats. They keep harassing us and the stupid girls are giggling at the spectacle… Then one of those arseholes in the bid to probably impress the girls has the audacity to touch my girl on the wrist… asking the normal question : “What time is it, while looking at his wrist to say look at my skin and then look at yours”… it’s the typical insult. All hell mothereffin’ broke LOOSE!!! My girl slapped the hell out of him (plus they are punks!) and he wanted to kick her… I got up, pulled his leg down and let him fall on the head. We then kicked him enough time before the bus stopped and we were thrown out… None of his friends actually got up to help him… Punks!

    And that was the first of many a fights I had in Morocco. At some point, I used to carry a knife going back and forth to Uni. It was that serious. When my mom came to visit, she decided I was no longer going to stay there, eff a scholarship I was going insane.

    By my last year, I had become so aggressive that I beat up a 14-15 year old girl and threatened her with doing it again and again every time I saw her (she lived in the neighborhood). Her mistake? Trying to be hard in front of her girls and provoking me. Her brother and mom came to our house to apologize, that’s how much she was terrorized. And I would have beaten her up too.

    Yeah, that place was insane. I have not been in a fight ever since I left… and intend to remain that way. I think I spent my lifetime fighting quota in Morocco.

    (and I as well want to apologize for doing a blog in the comment section.) Lol!

  4. V Renee
    November 18, 2009 at 7:25 pm

    @ LP – WOW I had no idea Morrocco was off the hook like that!!! I don’t blame you for keeping a knife tucked. And I am weak that yall whooped a man boy. LMAO

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