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Have You Ever………..

*** I couldn’t find what I needed for the direction that I wanted to go in on Fridays so this Friday it didn’t happen….. But hopefully I’ll everything together by next Friday***

I’m not affectionate. Nope being affectionate is not me. I blame my parents. I didn’t grow up in an affectionate household. We didn’t hug, we didn’t express our feelings, we did none of that. I really can’t even think of times where my parents were actually affectionate with each other. So inside my household I seen no examples.

Unfortunately, this did play a role in my first relationship. Awww teenage love. NOT So my bf from high school claimed he didn’t know that I cared about him because I wasn’t affectionate…. Whatever joker. You know I cared about you. So I wasn’t buying that. At least 10 years later he acknowledges that he understands now where I was coming from because there are other ways to show somebody that you care other than being up under them 24/7 , showering them with kisses constantly, and etc.

Luckily, I did notice as I got older, that being affectionate is something that can be brought out of me. In my 2nd relationship, I was very affectionate. Definitely not in the beginning. But he was patient with me and helped bring it out of me. It was in the little things like when we were apart on school breaks he knew I wasn’t going to be the one to say I miss you so he asked me if I missed him. So all I had to say was a simple yeah. Eventually it got to the point where he would  say tell me that you miss me and initially I would rush through and mumble it.  It took a lil while but I was finally able to just come out say I miss you without him guiding me. This is just a tidbit of how he helped me realize that I did have an affectionate side and it just needed to be brought out of me.

There was this one instance though when I met a guy and he was able to bring out my affectionate side ASAP. I met this guy at a club and he started calling/texting. In the very beginning I realized that he was someone who I needed to run FROM fast, quick, and in a hurry. Man, he had a mouthpiece on him. He was a pharmaceutical sales rep, so I’m like he talked for a living so this is what he did.  Surprisingly, our conversations intrigued me more than anything. After hassling me, I finally decided to meet up with him. I thought I was on my way to see him but the universe had other plans. My car didn’t start. I say that was some divine intervention because I had no business going anyway. Fast forward to the next week I was in his city for something and he texted me so I ended up telling him I was there. We agreed to meet up.

During our meetup I was soooo turned off. This man was sooooooo extra. First of all, we hugged and he grabbed my booty. Like grabbed both cheeks as if he’s known me forever and I told him that it was okay to just be grabbing on my booty like that. And usually I’m not on that at all it’s like no you didn’t, but in this case I just went with it. I might have actually liked it a tad bit. There was still something about him that intrigued the mess out of me. Here I am, this nonaffectionate person holding hands across the table with a guy that I didn’t even know. I really can’t even explain it. All I know is he was drawing things out of me that were scaring me. I was one to let my guard down slowly and  he was steady tearing it down quickly. I kept having to check myself like what the heck is going on 80’s this is not you. Needless to say we said our goodbyes and I never seen that man again. Nope, unh unh there was really no point. I knew right from wrong and I knew this guy was all the way wrong and I needed to snap out this intrigued state with the quickness. So I did. I had to. I didn’t like not feeling like myself. Nope, didn’t like it one bit.

My question to you…… Have you ever been in a situation where you weren’t acting like your normal self but you couldn’t actually explain why? You were aware that you weren’t but you still couldn’t snap out of it?  Have you ever been so intrigued that even though you know it was wrong you still went with it? Please don’t tell me I’m the only one so talk to me……….

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Categories: Uncategorized
  1. V Renee
    November 6, 2009 at 9:37 am

    All the time. But there are so many sides of me, that I’ve discovered over the years, that not much surprises me anymore. As for being in “intriguing” situations that were wrong- all I can do is laugh and say hells yeah!

    As for affection. My household wasn’t extremely affectionate, but we were at times. No scratch that, I’m probably the MOST affectionate in my family. Partly because I know it annoys my sister, so I hug on her all the time. And she hates it. My parents, I love on them all the time. BUT with friends, I am not affectionate at all. But I don’t mind them being affectionate with me. Go figure. In relationships, I’m pretty affectionate. If I like you, you will know…… Ha!

  2. ms80sbaby
    November 6, 2009 at 3:31 pm

    Partly because I know it annoys my sister, so I hug on her all the time.

    @V… This is how people are with me….. Know I can’t stand people in my personal space. So they make a habit of getting it mine.. .They lean towards me I’m leaning back. Like woahhhhh what u doing… LOL I hear you…. If I have something to drink then I can be the biggest flirt and if I got a crush on somebody they will know but that’s only because of the liquid courage….

    But yea I need to hear more about these intriguing situations…. hmmmmmmmmmm LMAO

  3. V Renee
    November 9, 2009 at 10:06 am

    Ill make a note that you don’t like people in your personal space….and be sure to get all up in it for shyts n giggles. Lol

    “But yea I need to hear more about these intriguing situations…. hmmmmmmmmmm LMAO”

    See what had happened was….lol

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