Home > Uncategorized > Sometimes I’d rather plead the 1,2,3,4, 5th!!

Sometimes I’d rather plead the 1,2,3,4, 5th!!

There are alot of instances in my life when I have thoughts but instead of voicing them I keep them to myself. A lot of times its because it’s not my place to say how I really feel. Sometimes I see no point in verbally voicing my opinion if someone has their mind made up. Me. Speak Up? For what? They’re gonna do what they want to do regardless, so my opinion really doesn’t even matter. There are plenty of reasons why I plead the fifth, to avoid altercations, to avoid hurting someones feelings,  to avoid influencing someone else’s decision, and etc.

In my freshman year of college, one of my requirements was Speech Communication. One thing that stuck out to me in this class was when my instructor said,  “Once you say something, you can never take it back”. And I truly believe this. I notice that people will say something that’s off the wall and then they’ll stick a “just playing”  on the end of it or if they’re writing it they’ll stick a LOL at the end of it. In the back of my mind I’m the one thinking nah, you weren’t joking.

In my junior year,  I had to take a Business Communication class and one of the most important lessons was that all forms of written communication is open for interpretation. A lot of times at my job before I send an email I’ll have a counterpart read over it to make sure I’m not inadvertently sounding too harsh. I’ve received several harsh emails from work and  instead of responding in a similar manner I’ll change the tone. Of course, this is after I’ve had a moment to cool down. Or I won’t even respond.  This is also VERY TRUE within the blogworld. I have found myself on several occasions refraining from typing holding my tongue. Mainly because some of the foolishness is not even worth a response. Sometimes it’s just that petty.

I know A LOT of people love to say ” I mean what I say and I say what I mean” , ” I stay keeping it real” , “Keeping it 100 is what  I do” and etc…..  . The real question is are YOU really being honest with yourself?  Or are you always the one saying something when nothing even needs to be said? Are you all TALK for no reason at all? Don’t forget the people who say  I wish so and so would have came to me… Do you really? You’ve already said your piece. You can’t take back what you said.  So what difference does it make if someone came to you or not?

So… Tell me how you really feel? Is it better for you to keep quiet? Or do you prefer to constantly give opinions and advice? Which works better for you?

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Categories: Uncategorized
  1. November 5, 2009 at 2:52 pm

    IM FIRST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  2. November 5, 2009 at 2:56 pm

    My first comment is in moderation..

    “if someone has their mind made up. Me. Speak Up? For what? They’re gonna do what they want to do regardless, so my opinion really doesn’t even matter.”

    To me giving my opinion is like validating me. But I see your point. I’m listening to something right now where the broadcaster is saying…”most people’s perceptions are REAL”. Your truth is however you’ve created it.

    so to your point, it may not matter what the opinion is over all. But I DO BELIEVE that all things are revealed and time ends up telling the truth.

  3. ms80sbaby
    November 5, 2009 at 3:09 pm

    But I DO BELIEVE that all things are revealed and time ends up telling the truth.

    @Comeback……And I can agree with this because time does end up telling the truth… Now, if safety is an issue or something then I’ll definitely speak up…. But for just general issues sometimes mums the word for me….

    One of my best friends is trying to figure out whether shes ready to let go or not in regards to her relationship… I personally never cared for the bf but did I ever let her know that. Heck no. It wasn’t my place. It wasn’t like he was physically harming her or anything. I always just listened to her venting. Even now since she’s came to me about it. I’m not saying you need to do this or you need to do that. I’m telling her she need to make a decision.

    I do believe that PEOPLE will eventually see for themselves what other people have been seeing all along.

  4. V Renee
    November 5, 2009 at 3:23 pm

    First off, I’m soooo excited that you have a blog!!!

    Second of all, I agree with you. I hold my tongue ALL the time. But that’s moreso because I know how I AM! There is no talking me out of things I’ve made my mind up about. And with that, I usually don’t even allow people the option of voicing their opinions. Either I A) Just do it and don’t ask for their opinion or B) Present it in a matter of fact way so that you know I am not looking for an opinion. 

    Now when I do ask for an opinion (which isn’t too often), I want someone to TELL ME THEIR TRUE OPINION! I don’t want to hear what you think I want to hear. But instead your honest to God opinion. 

    Also, I realize that sometimes people like to talk and don’t necessarily want input. They just want a sounding board. I usually just ask questions and let them figure out what they want to do. I actually think asking questions is more beneficial than offering advice. I agree that you can’t take things back. Therefore I try to be careful of not only what I say, but also how I present it.

  5. ms80sbaby
    November 5, 2009 at 3:37 pm

    Just do it and don’t ask for their opinion
    @V…This is me… And after it’s done I’m just like welp its nothing that can be done now…. LOL But my momma loves to say that I’m gonna do what I want to do regardless….

    Asking questions is a good one too. It makes them think about something they’ve probably not thought about before….

    Another one of my friends called me last night…. She met a guy off of facebook. They’ve been chatting it up for over 2 months. He wants her to fly to see him. She asked my opinion…. I haven’t talked to this guy I don’t know what he’s like so I can’t speak on behalf of him….. All I could say was follow your instinct. I’m like I’m sure it’s telling you something but make sure you’re actually listening…..If you feel like you can trust him then hey go for it…

    Re: In regards to this blog….. I’ve thought about using it since I had it…… But today I just felt like it’s time to start talking to the BLOG WORLD… LMAO So I did…..

    BLOGWORLD….*singing* HERE I AM….lol

  6. V Renee
    November 5, 2009 at 3:50 pm

    “But my momma loves to say that I’m gonna do what I want to do regardless…. ”

    My mama says this about me too!! She knows I’m crazy though. Ha!

  7. LP
    November 5, 2009 at 3:57 pm

    HI Ms. 80’s!!!

    Glad to see your new blog!!

    Me? I like to talk. I like to offer opinions sometimes unsollicited.Ha!, but I have to give the opinion knowing full well that the person might not or will not take it. I offer opinions and try not to take it personal.

    I was in debate clubs growing up. I have always loved a healthy exchange of opinions, it teaches me about what I believe, how other people think and how we see things in general. Unless, the subject bores me to tears, I will usually offer an opinion until I am told to shut up. Then I will. 🙂

    Can’t wait to see where the blog goes next!!!

  8. ms80sbaby
    November 5, 2009 at 4:06 pm

    I have always loved a healthy exchange of opinions, it teaches me about what I believe, how other people think and how we see things in general.

    @LP… .And this is something that I love about you. You don’t necessarily give your opinions in a “I’m LP and you should do it this way because I said so and blah, blah”.. That’s not you. You give an opinion in a treading lightly kind of way where you making sure you’re not offending…..

    You and me both can’t wait to see where this blog goes next…. LOL

  9. LP
    November 5, 2009 at 4:14 pm

    @80’s,

    @LP… .And this is something that I love about you.

    Oh thanks darl!

    Truth be told, it took A LONG TIME to get there. And irl, I’m not completely there yet… 😆

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